Ten Funkiest Cartoon Themes of the 1970s!

Yeah. I said it, 1970s. I am an old fart.

But this is when I watched cartoons and frankly they were better. These were among the funkier ones from my, (albeit, foggy,) memories.

10. The original "Scooby-Doo, Where Are You." Of course, I am talking the pre-Scrappy version. The opening theme alone was better than just about every episode that starred Scrappy Doo.

9. "Fat Albert." Not only was the theme song cool, "The Gang" would do a tune mid-way through the show, (on bed springs and washtubs and other shit,) that was usually pretty groovy, y'know, to its target audience's sophisticated tastes. Hey, hey, hey!

8. "Hong Kong Phooie." Whoops! Hold on... I just re-listened to this, and despite having Scatman Cruthers on vocals, there is no funk here. Disregard this entry.

7. The Banana Splits! technically not a cartoon, but a cartoon show! The theme song was more 'fun' than 'funk' but DAMN! I wanted one of those Banana-Buggies!

6. "Kimba the White Lion." I'm sorry. I can't get this bouncy little ditty out of my head. It's been a week now. Dear God! Someone help me!

5. "Underdog." Yeah. I said it. Listen for yourself.

4. "Speed Racer." "He's a dmeon and he's gonna be chasin' after someone!" It was really cool to be a kid back then. (But how did nobody ever put together that "Racer X" was actually "Rex Racer", Speed's long lost brother, thought to be dead?)

3. "The Pink Panther."

Okay. Perhaps having a theme song composed by Henry Mancini gives this one an unfair edge.

2. DANGER ISLAND! ("Uh-Oh! Chong-go!) This "Banana Splits" featurette had james Bond-era cool written all over it! And it was a great live-action show for children, too!

1. The absolutely funkiest cartoon theme song ever: The Harlem Globetrotters Show!

Just plain cool.

Write Your Own Theme Song!

Holy Son of a Moly! One Hundred Posts! Who said I'd never accomplish anything? (Oh yeah, that was my high school guidance counsellor, my father, most teachers, the parish priest... the list goes on, but who can be bothered to finish something like that.) In any case, for my one hundredth post, I decided to give something back to the community. I little plan that might make the whole world just a little bit brighter.

I call this plan, "Write Your Own Theme Song!"

I love sitcoms. From my (albeit, skewed,) perspective, sitcoms rate up there as one of America’s greatest contributions to the world of entertainment, right alongside Major League Baseball, presidential scandals, mocking the French, and of course, Humor Blogs.

Sitcoms’ theme songs are so cool, too. Especially the late sixties, early seventies shows like “Gilligan’s Island,” “Beverly Hillbillies,” “The Brady Bunch,” et cetera. They used their theme songs to bring an audience “up to speed.” A first time viewer could listen to the opening song and immediately know what was going on and who was involved.

“Oh, I see. They are stuck on an island! And what an assortment of personalities. Hilarity must ensue!”

So comforting.

Now, I do not mean to imply that these songs were formulaic, but there WAS a specific formula that was used almost without fail, (okay, maybe I do mean to imply they were formulaic.) But if these opening themes could express a situation so succinctly, and let a person know the what was happening and who was who in a minute or two, then maybe people could benefit from having one.

It was with this philanthropic idea, (“What a swell guy!”) that I put together a few simple lines to help out those literarily-challenged individuals in composing a theme song of their very own.

Simply select a line for each corresponding, lettered space in the following verses and there you have it! Your own theme song. Think of it as a musical "Mad-Libs."

Give it a whack!

Of course, I don't want people to limit themselves to my verses! These are just offered out to those who want them to share the story of their own 'situation.'

Just my way of giving back to society.

"Y'all come back, now. Y'hear?"

Your humble author with his "Lady Friend" and costars on the set of her show.

"CHRIS! is the one, sweeter than a sticky bun,

CHRIS! is the one, working hard... and having fun.

CHRIS!"