Sunday, January 17, 2010

My New Tattoo

So lately I have been thinking about getting another tattoo.

It's true that there are "Tattoo people" and "non-Tattoo People" but some folk, (like your humble author, for example,) fall somewhere between these loyalty lines. We like some ink, but don't feel that every chapter of our lives needs to be illustrated on our person.

But, in my consideration, I chose to do a wee bit of research. "Let's see what's out there!" I told myself. Holy moly, what a mess! Frankly, there are too many bad decisions committed to ink-on-flesh in the world, it turns out.

Then, in typical lazy-ass fashion, I figured, "Hey, this crap would make a good blog posting!" and decided to find some of the best of the worst in permanent body art. Remember, that once upon a time, someone, somewhere, thought each of the following tattoos was a GOOD idea!

Except this. I refuse to believe that someone once thought it was a good idea to turn his navel into a monkey sphincter about to get digitally probed. It can't be.

Okay. Lesson here: Groceries aren't the only thing you should avoid shopping for when you are hungry.

Finally! Someone decided to acknowledge that Gumby ALSO died for our sins!

There is symbolism here that I cannot begin to understand...

See this here? Vegetarians simply lack this level of commitment!

I've never heard of "Fudgetown," but according to this Carebear, it must be nice. Y'know, wholesome an' shit.

This one makes me feel optimistic. If there is a tattoo out there for every crap sitcom from the eighties, then maybe my "Misadventures of Sheriff Lobo" idea isn't so far-fetched!

I think it is fairly unanimous that crystal meth and self-inked tattoos don't mix well...

This doesn't necessarily apply to the tattoo artist's spelling skills.

And now, frankly, we all look illiterate. Thanks, Slash.

On second thought, maybe I'll just buy a new t-shirt.


  1. Got ink? I do, but just one. It's fairly well hidden and, no, it's not a tramp stamp.

  2. Nothing wrong with the Tramp Stamp!

    Let's us guys know just how hard we have to work for it...

  3. I just love that Gumby tattoo.

  4. The Gumby and the clown puking the rainbow are keepers! A buddy of mine has a theme of tattoos on one arm - all ornate evil clowns - with Krusty the clown right in the center - awesome!

  5. I can only assume that the Killer Clowns From Outer Space made that arm! Great Flick!

    I might even say "AWSOME!"


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